Hollywood Walk Of Fame Entirely Removed After All Stars Found To Be Unworthy
18 blocks of sidewalk on Hollywood Blvd. have been demolished in an attempt to remove any stars from the famed Hollywood Walk Of Fame who were of of questionable character. 2600 bronze stars with engraved names had been installed in the sidewalks over the last century to immortalize those entertainers who achieved the heights of success in their given field.
Over the last few years as various people were revealed to be rapists, or racists, or had violated some other code of conduct, the governing board would consider whether or not thei person's star could remain. Recently, Donald Trump's star had been vandalized multiple times, as had Bill Cosby's.
Lisa Thomas, spokesperson for the Walk Of Fame Commission explains, "The Walk has always included a few people who raised eyebrows. But we are Hollywood, the machine that cranks out offensive entertainment by the truckload. So we really didn't see an reason to get holier-than-thou. Then the politically correct crowd started forcing their cause on everyone. It was literally worse than the Christians. At least Christians never actually vandalized the stars. So we had to meet and discuss who we would allow to remain, and who would have to go. It became obvious very quickly that everyone had to go. Everyone on the Walk had either been sexually promiscuous, or told dirty jokes, or hated someone, or any other number of things you can imagine. This is Hollywood. We literally have most of them on film doing offensive things. So we decided it was best to go ahead and dig up every one of the 2600 stars. That was the only safe way to go."
The Walk Of Fame is not scrapping the idea of future stars. But as of right now, there is only one Hollywood actor who would qualify for a star according to Thomas. "Kirk Cameron. We all agreed that he deserves a star, and nothing we know about him would disqualify him. We did have one person who said that his becoming a Christian disqualified him. But we don't want to go out of business entirely. So there will at least be one star. We may have to change the name of our tour to the "Hollywood Stand Of Fame" since you won't actually have to walk to enjoy the whole tribute."